Dyeing Eggs Is Fun, Right?

Sometimes I forget that my little ones are...well, little. I had something in my head about dyeing Easter eggs that wasn't quite reality. Next year I'll try to remember, and I think it will be more fun for everyone. Here's what I learned.

Covering the table is a good idea.

Little hands have to touch water. Especially when it's purple.

Eggs need time to turn vibrant colors. Preschoolers don't have that much patience.

Stickers don't really stay on when they're in water.

Last, the crayon is for before the egg is dyed, not after. I learned this after complaining to my friend, who happens to be a scientist AND a seasoned egg dyer. I was just following the instructions, which clearly said DO NOT DECORATE UNTIL THE EGG IS COMPLETELY DRY. Apparently writing with a crayon is different from decorating. Crayon before. Stickers after. Got it.

My First FB Quiz

We're driving down the road and Big Sissy says to me, "Mommy, my favorite color of traffic light is red, but I bet yours is green."

Why, yes, oh Analytical One. You are right, my child.

Which brings me to the first of my Facebook Quizzes I am writing. I see the weirdest ones out there: "Which Kenny Chesney Song Are You?" "What Kind of Car Are You?" "What Color Is Your Aura?" "Which Position Are You?" (Don't ask. I didn't actually want to see my friend's results on this one.)

So Here's The Quiz: "What Color of Traffic Light Are You?"

Red: You don't like to get in a hurry--ever. You appreciate opportunities to look around, observe others, and you don't want to be rushed. You need those extra moments in the car to put on makeup, study for your exam, read your directions, put on pantyhose--all the things you didn't do at home because you don't like to be in a hurry. You are social and analytical at the same time.

Yellow: You are a thrill seeker. You like the challenge of a yellow light because it prompts you to go a little faster and make it through before it becomes red, although you're really OK with a little orange tint in the light. You believe rules were made to be broken--especially inane rules. You live for the moment and handle change well.

Green: You are focused and task-oriented. You know where you are going and are not easily diverted from the goal. Red lights represent a kink in your plans, and you have a hard time adjusting to change. You want people with you, along for the ride, but you don't have time for many distractions. You will usually marry a yellow or red light.

I'm usually a red light girl, but I'm finding myself in a green light phase of life. What color traffic light are you?

Delilah (Samson's Version)

My friend Lance posted this on Facebook. I couldn't find the "polished" version, but it still cracks me up. A little Sunday School humor for you...

What It Takes to Potty Train

We started potty training Little Sissy this week. I am pretty sure you can accomplish this with just a toilet, a stepstool, toilet paper, handsoap, Clorox wipes, and lots of patience. But since I am missing one of these assets (I'll never tell which one), I tend to go overboard in preparation. This is one of my LEAST favorite parts of parenting, probably because it did not go well with Big Sissy. It was characterized by lots of tantrums, lots of frustration, and lots of time in nasty bathrooms. I'm optimistic that everything will be easier the second time around. But still...

Here are some things I have that I do NOT need:

First of all, I do not need this ugly vinyl flooring in my bathroom. Unfortunately, when we moved in the house, replacing this floor was not the priority. I also don't need Toilet Learning, a book my pediatrician recommended. It totally creeps me out. It has pictures of mommies going potty, daddies going potty, firemen going potty, etc. They are rated G drawings, but still...gross. The other book is fun and makes a fun flushing sound when you push the button over and over and over and over...

I also have regular panties, padded panties, plastic pants to go over panties, and plastic panty/regular panty combination. The WalMart bag is for when all the above-listed urine catchers fail while we're out in public. The jar is to collect quarters: one for a potty and two for a poopy. I didn't really choose this method. It sort of evolved from my dad giving Big Sissy quarters when she kept her pull-up dry at their house. I really don't believe in paying people for things they should be doing anyway. I just don't want the sense of entitlement to get started...but here we are giving quarters. The problem is that it is going pretty well, and it's getting expensive. Right now she has exactly 8 quarters and 3 dandelions in her jar.

Here are the things I have that I do need:

And one cute little girl who is more than happy to hang out in Ariel panties while she learns to go potty like a big girl.

Oh, I also have a potty chair which I only use in an emergency (ie. all the other toilets are in use). I can't stand dumping out the urine, cleaning it out, etc. I just want to flush everything away and be done with it. I know big toilets can be scary, but driving a car is scary and I learned to do it, right? Just kidding--sort of. I am hanging onto the potty chair for a while, though. It's apparently much faster than learning to actually walk.

Family Reading Time

Big Sissy is reading "My Sister's Keeper" by Jodi Picoult. She thinks it's my Bible. I think she was singing about Abraham. Or she might be praying, judging from her kneeling position. Little Buddy's book of choice is the car seat installation manual. He's such a boy.

I've Heard of Fits Like That

This is what it looks like when Little Buddy has free reign of the spoon. Cute, but a little messy...yes?

So today I thought I would just drive for a while so we could get the mission accomplished. Little Buddy threw himself into a fit like I've only heard of. He cried so hard and so long that he forgot to breathe. He literally turned blue and his eyes rolled back in his head. I think he was about 1 second from passing out when we turned him upside down and snapped him back into reality. That might be the scariest thing I've ever seen him do. It took him a good ten minutes of cuddle time to recover. Please tell me my sweet little baby is not going to start doing the "Give me what I want or I'll hold my breath until I pass out" thing. PLEASE!!!! Did I say I had the baby bug? Can I take it back?

Bubble Gum, Bubble Gum, In a Dish

Our girls have learned some new rhymes lately from some of the "big kids" in our small group. One is eenie meenie miny moe, which I was glad to hear "catch a TIGER by his toe." Sadly, that's not how I learned it. How embarrassing. Another new rhyme, which they are obsessed with, is "Bubble gum, bubble gum in a dish. How many pieces do you wish?"

Little Sissy has simultaneously gotten confused and gotten obsessed with this rhyme. Probably a dozen times a day she asks me, "How many people do you wish?" I've gotten very boring. I always say 5, since that's how many people are in our family. It's really fun to ask when we're somewhere else, though, so we can name all the people present. She asks other people this too, which is especially confusing because of the way she talks combined with the fact that the question doesn't make sense even with perfect articulation.

Last night, after promising myself I was going to bed at a decent time, I was still up at 1 a.m. I was downstairs on the computer (of course), when I heard little footsteps running upstairs. I ran up to see what was wrong. Little Sissy, squinting because she was still half asleep, rubbed her eyes and said, "I jus' need to ask you sumpin'."

"What is it, honey?"
"Um...um...um...how many people do you 'ish?"

So I have a computer obsession, and she has a "bubble gum in a dish" obsession. I guess it's genetic.