Celebration of Discipline

I read a book in college--recommended by my InterVarsity staff worker--called Celebration of Discipline. It's a classic. I don't remember a lot about it even though I own it. The book is meant to spur us on to spiritual disciplines, but I felt defeated by even the title. Discipline to me is not a celebration; it is hard work and I'm just not good at it. Thankfully I've never had a weight problem. What I have now is, I think, the result of 3 babies in 4 years. Ask me next year if it's a problem...Anyway, If I got heavy enough I could usually fix it fairly effortlessly. I would get in moods of exercising. These moods could last months, but I still wouldn't call it a discipline. I've never been addicted to drugs or alcohol, so staying away from those things doesn't require much discipline. Here's what's hard for me: not spending money. I have many friends who don't seem to have a problem at all in this area. I admire them and I try to get tips from them, and if those friends are reading this, you will probably be appalled at my lack of discipline in this area just as I don't understand how people get hooked on drugs, etc. OK. There it is.

We got to a place this month where we had $10 to last a little over a week. This was not unusual when I was single. In fact, it happened every week. It was built into the budget. I could either rent 2 blockbuster movies or get one movie at shop-n-save and go out with the college group for a soda, etc. It SUCKED, but I got used to it. I ate a lot of cereal for dinner because I chose to buy a new shirt instead of eating. Now that I am married with children, this isn't a choice. Children need nutritious food, and husbands need meat. Luckily, we saw this coming and I actually planned meals to last us until the end so we could spend the $10 on milk and bananas--which constantly need restocked in our house. Now, don't go thinking we're poor. I don't want groceries to show up at my door because of this blog. We're not poor. We just chose (mostly I chose) to spend money on extra things this month. I bought things for a birthday party, had a fun girls' night out, bought some very discounted clothes to save for the kids, went to the Muny...

But can I tell you how hard it was to get through this past week and a half? We skipped our Tuesday night at Cecil Whittakers. I went to the mall and didn't buy a thing--no smoothie, no coffee, no gumballs for the girls. We went on a picnic and didn't get Subway sandwiches. Nope. I just made them the old-fashioned way. I declined a Longaberger basket party. I bought groceries at Aldi's. Basically we didn't leave the house much because I didn't trust myself. I was kind of feeling sorry for myself until I was standing in line at Aldi's behind a man who looked down on his luck. He had a moderate amount of groceries in his cart, and his card was denied. He looked so sad and defeated. I don't know his story and maybe he has addictions, but maybe he feels like I felt this week all the time. My heart was so sad for him, and I felt even more embarrassed about how spoiled I am--hating that I even had to shop there. I really think if I wasn't so committed to staying home with my kids, I would get whatever kind of job I could to support my spending habits. But here's the good news. We did it. Payday is tomorrow. I've learned a lesson about discipline, and I truly have cause to celebrate. The credit cards stayed tucked away, and we have cents left in our account. I'm embarrassed that this is such an issue for me, but I'm thankful that God always sees fit to help me grow in every area! Celebrate!