Civil War Heroes

General Little Buddy, loved by soldiers and civilians alike for being a fearless leader.

Confederate spy Big Sissy. Her calm and stoic nature contributed to her camouflaged identity.

Most women, like brave Little Sissy, took care of the homefront while the men were away.

Hey, that's me. Sorry. These aren't pictures from the Civil War after all. They're just our sketches from Chuck E. Cheese's. My bad.

The Mama Privilege

I know what she's saying when no one else does.

I know their idiosyncrasies. Little Buddy needs one for each hand. Little Sissy likes the bottom sheet but not the top sheet. Fancy shoes always. Big Sissy needs things all in a row and needs to complete the first thing before moving on to the next. Comfortable shoes always.

I know that when he moves toward the baby with his mouth open, he's going to kiss her--not bite her.

I know the names of all 57 stuffed animals in their beds and get to hold them when they're sad.

I know when the tears are real and when they're contrived.

I get the privilege of kissing the tears away.

I know their favorite foods, their fears, what makes them excited, what makes them sad.

I get to be their first teacher.

I get to hear her read her first words.

I get to watch him take his first steps.

I get to cheer when she goes on the potty for the first time.

I get to see things with fresh eyes as they explore.

I get to hold them and tell them how special they are.

I am in their corner, their advocate.

I am blessed to be their mama.

A Puddle Splasher Day

Hubby took off work today so we could go to the zoo, but alas, the weatherman was actually right this time. It DID rain all morning. We visited the "children's zoo" at Chuck E. Cheese's instead. The girls were just as excited to go there and get dressed up in their puddle splashers.

It's Just Soy Milk, Officer

He looks a little drunk, but I'm so proud!

Happy 15 Months, Little Buddy!

Dear Little Buddy,

I can't believe you are 15 months old today. You are becoming such a big boy right before my eyes. I'm not pregnant either, so I get to enjoy this phase without the extra tiredness of hosting a little sibling for you. Sometimes I wish you had a brother, though. One never knows what lies ahead for our family. But for now...I am loving this time with you.

The doctor says you are a little delayed with walking and talking. I knew that, but I'm not worried. You are taking some steps, and soon you'll figure out that talking gets you what you want much quicker than pointing and waiting. You'll get it, Buddy. In the meantime, you are so loveable and precious. You are always eager to give hugs and kisses, and so so so cuddly. Even though you are weaned now, I still cherish bedtime when I can rock you and read books with you and just cuddle. You are content there, and so am I.

You are also getting taller and leaner. When you were 5 months old we called you the Michelin Man because of all your rolls...

...but now you are growing long and lean like your daddy. You love to explore. You are exploring using utensils...

and climbing on every chair, table, and piece of furniture that you see.

Most of all, you are God's gift to our family. I love you so much, baby boy!

Recurring Dream

I am obsessed with movies about the Holocaust. Recently there was a Hallmark movie on about this very subject, and I nearly threw the TV through the window because now that we have the converter box the reception is TERRIBLE. My favorite movie is Life Is Beautiful. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it.

This all started in 6th grade, when our "enrichment" class studied Germany and WWII. We watched The Diary of Anne Frank, learned some German, and even saw pictures of incinerated bodies piled up. Seriously. I've had nightmares ever since. The recurring dream is that the Nazis are chasing me through my house, which looks like a church, and I have to keep going through secret passageways to get away from them. When I was about 22 I went to a church in Springfield, MO, and I realized that it looked like the church in my dreams. I could picture where the secret tunnels and hidden doors were. Creepy. I think one time they caught me and I never had the dream again...

until this week. Maybe it's the Hallmark movie or the fact that Big Sissy's best friend speaks German. Or it could be the fact that I feel like Christian values are being threatened more and more. But I dreamed that all Christians were being persecuted and forced into hiding. It was kind of an adrenaline rush, actually. This might just prove how boring my real life is. I think, though, that if I ever get to build my dream house I'm going to have a secret hiding place built in...just in case. Is that weird? Wait. Don't answer that.

Do you have a recurring dream?

Spring Program

Tonight was Big Sissy's last night of her 3-year-old choir. I remember sitting with her the first night, back in September, wondering if she would be OK, if she would make friends--typical mommy stuff. It's taken all year, but she has grown quite attached to the little girls in her class. Tonight was the grand finale. The grandparents came and made a big fuss over her, and we went home and had ice cream in waffle bowls. Here are some of the highlights.

Ready to go on the stage

Oops. One mom didn't get the dress code memo.

I think videographer Daddy forgot who the star of the show was supposed to be, although I have to admit that the tattoo-snake-on-the-arm kid was a riot.