Transitions

Right now I am watching Little Sissy play with little plastic balls in our basement. She is discovering the cool sound they make when you throw them on the concrete floor. It's such a disappointment to accidentally hit the carpet and not get the same auditory experience. Big Sissy is taking a nap, which is great because she doesn't always. But this is not great because it's 4:00 and Little Sissy took her nap at 11:30. She seems to be transitioning to one nap only, which means they are now on totally different schedules. What this means for me is (1) It's hard to go anywhere because someone's always napping and (2) I'm no longer one of those people napping.

The other transition is that now I would normally be anticipating Hubby'arrival and family dinner time. Last week he started a new job (still at UPS). It's more money, which is much needed and appreciated. But his hours are crazy (mostly nights). Our family time now is after he wakes up (around 1 in the afternoon) and before he goes to work (around 4). We haven't really figured out yet when our husband/wife together time is. The good news is that I think I'm almost over the pregnancy hump. For example, I didn't take a nap all weekend and I was OK, a little tired but still functioning. AND, I ate a salad for dinner last night and was OK (meaning I didn't have to go back later to get 2 hamburgers and a milkshake). This is good for our grocery budget and my weighing-in shock syndrome.

Hopefully soon we'll figure out our family schedule and will have a new normal. Right now I feel confused, like I'm always waiting for something but I'm not sure what is supposed to happen next. This seems to be proof that I am not good at change even though I pretend to be the live-on-the-fly spontaneous one in our family. More updates later on our transitions. In other news, we're shopping for mini vans. This is not a transition I ever thought I would like but I'm actually excited to have more space and the ability to take someone else with us in our car. Big Sissy is a lot like me, however, so I'm already having to talk her through the idea that when we get a van that means we will no longer have our car she's so attached to. I think, in conclusion, that we like new things as long as it means we don't have to let go of anything else good or familiar.

Naming another person

Man, how in the world did Adam name all those animals in the garden? He must have been so creative! I had no problem naming Big Sissy, but we deliberated over Little Sissy's name for months. Now, though I still love the name, I regret that there are so many children with her name. I always swore I wouldn't do that to a child (I always had to give my last name to distinguish myself from all the others with the same name). So now I have the challenge of naming yet another little person. I want an old-fasioned name that doesn't sound like a dumpy great aunt in her flowered bathrobe. I need to get a warm fuzzy feeling about it. But it can't be on the top 50 list in the last decade either. Any ideas?? Of course, I'm assuming we'll have another girl. Who knows?! If I have a boy, at least I get to start with a new list.

Need Pictures

These are some fun recent pics of the girls. Big Sissy loves to play dress-up. In this one she's being "Dr. Brimm." The one of Little Sissy is at the Magic House. She had a great time crawling up the little slides and chewing on the balls that hundreds of kids play with...eeeew. She's so happy though! We're doing more indoor play right now because of the heat wave.

No Return, No Exchange

Big Sissy is always saying things that make me laugh. Today I asked her if we got a new baby would she want a baby brother or baby sister. "Brudder," she said without hesitation. Then she pointed at Little Sissy, "But we need to take this baby back to God." Oops. I'll have to explain the no return/no exchange policy on the babies we already have.

Beautiful Ultrasound

I had an early ultrasound today to hear the baby's heartbeat. I don't know if my doctor does this for everyone or if it's because I'm high risk, but it makes me cry even the third time around. Of course I had a positive pregnancy test and I gag just brushing my teeth, but it would be easy to dismiss those things and pretend this isn't real. But seeing a little tiny form that already had a strong, beating heart is absolutely amazing. No wonder Pregnancy Resource Centers use ultrasound machines as a deterrent to abortion. There is no doubting the life I just saw growing in my womb. I wish everyone could have an early ultrasound and experience the beauty. At least now when I am gagging at the smell of someone's lunch, I can balance it with the notion that I have the awesome privilege of carrying this little growing person. So it was a good report--things are going as they should!!

A New Little Surprise

Here's what's going on in my world. We're going to have another baby!!!! Yes, it's true, and yes I know how this happens. I'm having some mixed emotions right now because it's all so new. I'm thrilled at the thought of having another child and I love that he/she will be close in age with the others. Since we got such a late start, I didn't think I would have the opportunity to have 3. I am so blessed! Then the reality strikes me...I am going to be huge pregnant with 2 little ones who still want/need to be held quite often. I remember how my back hurt by the end last time and how I couldn't get up from the floor and how Big Sissy would hide in these little places that I couldn't get to. And then I'm going to have a newborn and I'll have no sleep and I'll have to get up to get the other 2 ready anyway and they'll only be 3 and 1 and limited as to what they can do for themselves. And then they'll all be in college at the same time and we have to find a way to pay for that, but before that we'll have 2 in diapers full-time and one probably still in pull-ups at night and we have to find a way to pay for that. OK....breathe. Let's focus. God has always provided. That long time of waiting for Big Sissy gives me a good perspective to realize what an amazing miracle this is, and even for my positive ept I really had a desire to have another child. This is quite a shift from how I felt in the early months after Little Sissy came. So God was kind to prepare me in that way. AND at least this time we have a house and a place to put a crib. And at least this child was not conceived at my parents' house--there's something just wrong about that. :) So as I talk myself through this and wait for the unexpected and terrifying unknown, I still have this blessed peace in my heart that this is going to be another amazing child that God has planned all along to place in our family. I truly am blessed!